Well....
It has been a long time since I blogged. I started this blog to try and have a place to write my thoughts throughout my weight loss journey. I started it as a place to keep track of progress, feelings, struggles, successes.....and I haven't posted any of that in a very long time. To be honest....when I was doing well, I didn't think it was necessary. Who wants to read a bunch of "yay me" posts, right? Well...Right about now I am almost wishing I had kept it up. Held myself accountable, and kept track of everything going on in life. I am going to attempt to do a little catch up here real quick to bring everyone up to speed in case you aren't following me on FB or IG.
First off....I managed to lose right at 44lbs and 55 inches and get into a size 11/12 pants! What?! I started out in 22's....20's were too tight even though that is what I was wearing.
That picture on the right was taken in January 2014
These two pictures are 2 years apart to the day.
I successfully trained for and ran my very first Half Marathon on July 4th! I was scared and nervous and I was afraid I wouldn't really be able to cross that finish line....but I DID! I may have had to walk from mile 9-12 but we ran the last mile and we sprinted through that finish line. I was very lucky to have an amazing friend run it with me (even though she could have walked next to me as I "ran") but she stuck with me anyway. I love her dearly and I don't think I could have ever finished it without her encouragement....especially that last half mile! I can't explain the feeling of crossing that finish line and seeing my hubby and kids there waiting for me. It was amazing and I am getting teary eyed just writing about it.
Oh....one more thing I should fill you in on! I became a Beachbody Coach! I have been running my Mommy's Losing Rolls Weight loss challenges for almost 2 years and I had a friend who had been telling me how much of an inspiration I was to so many and that she thought it was a no brainer next step. I was hesitant. I wasn't sure I had what it takes to be a "coach". I wasn't sure people would trust someone who is still in the middle of her weight loss journey to help them achieve their health and fitness goals....but what I DID know was this....
I love helping people. I love interacting with people who are on the same journey as me. I love inspiring people. I love empowering people to help themselves. I love seeing people happy. I love seeing people proud. I love doing all of these things myself too....and in the last 2 1/2 months that is what Beachbody has allowed for me to do for myself and for more people than I thought possible. I decided to join the Team at Beachbody so that I can continue on this journey and keep inspiring and empowering the people that I come into contact with to do good for themselves. To get healthy and fit and regain control and ENJOY their lives!
I have completed PiYo (which I truly loved and wish I had been doing it during my half training!) and I gained a lot of muscle tone in my arms and lost a few inches. I recently started the 21 Day Fix because food still continues to be my biggest struggle. While I was training for my half marathon I slacked on my eating habits and guess what...I didn't gain. I did not lose either. What I failed to keep in mind is that by allowing myself to slip back into my old food habits not only was I going to have trouble breaking those habits again....but I was also no longer burning a ton of calories from training anymore. I didn't run for 2 months after my half. I still haven't done much and I'll be honest....I miss it! What?!? Yep. It's true. I like running. Who would have thought 2 years ago at the beginning of my journey I would say that?! Not me, that's for sure. Anyway....21 Day Fix meal plan is so easy, and I was so tired of logging everything I ate in MyFitnessPal every day for the last 2 years. I wanted something that would be able to help me get into the habit of recognize a proper serving size and of the right foods! So far I am loving it and I am just starting week 3 today. The meal plan is great and the workouts are surprisingly tough. 30 minutes and I am sore all over the next day!
Now, all that said....the point that I even decided to write this blog today is this.
I'm Struggling.
Yep. Me. A Coach.
A Real life mom of 3 who already lost 44 lbs.
A woman who completed a HALF MARATHON 3 months ago.
A wife who tries to keep up with the house.
A friend who seems to be doing well.
A sister who you believe to be an inspiration.
I have been hush hush because I was afraid to admit it. Maybe because I know I have made my journey so public and I was afraid for people to know that I am having a tough time. Maybe, and probably mostly, because I was unwilling to admit it to myself that I was struggling and I didn't have it under control as much as I wanted to feel like I did.
It has been a perfect storm type occasion that has caused me to gain weight.
There. I said it. It's out there.
Now that I have said it....I can finally acknowledge it and start to move past it.
The combination of bad eating habits I started while in my training, and did not have control over, and the fact that I was burning a lot less calories than I had been, led to gaining about 6lbs in the month after my half....and now recently....I finally weaned my youngest daughter from nursing at 2 1/2 years old and I think the combination of crazy unbalanced hormones have added another 9lbs in the past month since she completely stopped nursing. I find it funny that when I go back and read my first blog entries that I was wanting to make sure my supply for her stayed in tact through out cutting back calories and exercising. I also find it funny that most women say they lose a TON of weight from nursing alone. Well. I never felt I was that person. I never tried with either of the boys to lose much weight....but I did manage to lose with Mazie. Now fast forward 2 years and I gained when I weaned her!!! I am frustrated at the gain to say the least. I think I was letting the gain effect me more than I should because I was trying to keep it to myself. Why?! I'm honestly not sure...but I know other women have had this same problem when they fully weaned their babies....and apparently I am no different than them.
Basically I wanted to share this here so that if you are hiding or ashamed of weight gain after loss....or weight gain in general, don't be! It happened. It is your reality. It won't just disappear. You gained it....and now you can lose it. You've done it before, you know what to do, and you can lose it again. Don't hang your head and hide.
You are human. You are Beautiful. You are important.
The people who love you will be there to support you no matter what, and as long as you continue moving forward and take steps to get healthy, whether the scale moves down or not, you are on the right track.
Okay that might have been a little speech to myself as well. Haha. But it all still applies.
So, what I would like to say now that I put it all out there is... I started with the Fix 2 weeks ago and have lost 4 lbs but I haven't taken new measurements, but I am on my way back down. I am hoping that I can lose another 2 this week to make it 6lbs and then I'll have another 10 to get to where I was when I ran my half (174lbs). I plan on blogging once a week to keep my progress tracked here for accountability for myself. I know I've said that before, but this time I mean it. Lol. You can hold me to it!
One last thing....
If you are struggling please don't hesitate to reach out. To me, or anyone....just take the first step. I know it is a hard thing to admit that you need help sometimes, but I just did....so if anything I said resonated with you please don't hesitate to reach out to me, or a friend. Support is the biggest part of this journey to get healthy!